Silent Marriages

Is it enough to have a husband,and never mind the fact that he has not looked at your face for years, ... not spoken to you in decades? I was reading "A Matter of Time" by Shashi Despande and this line struck me. Or rather made me think about the marriage system in India. Can a husband and wife live like this? I guess, yes, in India it is certainly possible. And why is this system of "Once married, always married" so prevalent ?? It's because people don't search for their soulmate. Instead bride and/or groom look for wealth, family name, prestige or plain just some family who can "adjust" to THEM. Yes, you heard it right, one does not marry a guy/girl but the entire hierarchy of his/her family tree as well.There is no place for "Shall we dance in the rain?" or "Do you like strawberries with Cream?" or "Let's gaze at the stars?" questions. And,once married, it's like having acquired whatever one wanted to acquire and nothing else matters. It doesn't matter whether the wife and husband get along with each other or not, or if they love each other or not.What matters is that you are married and society should be shown only that certificate, not the intricate workings or non-workings of it.

The West is so different with respect to marriage or relationships per se. A guy will marry a girl only if he likes her well. He doesn't care much about her family and vice versa.And very often you get an interesting set of new in-laws.
Also,the girl will never allow her husband and in-laws to harass or abuse her. Sadly though, the people in the West have little patience and if there arises a problem between the couple very few give it a serious try to rescue their relationship.

If we could combine the attitude of the guy/girl in the West with the patience and perseverence of the couples here in India, we would certainly get some great relationships!!

Had a chat with a class mate of mine who got recently married. When asking about his wife he was telling me that "She is an amazing person" !! This was the first time that I heard someone praise their better half. I know, I know, Change has to start from within oneself. But, when was the last time you praised someone at all ?!?