Our Bundle of Joy

I am back after a looong hibernating period .... But I'm not alone this time. To be more precise, we are awaiting a "bundle of joy" to join our family :) Yes, I am expecting and I must say it feels really great !!!
I am in my 22nd week now and I and my body have gone through a lot of changes already. It is fascinating to see the various stages of a baby's growth. God is really an awesome creator !! He's taken care of everything. Right from the beginning there is life ... even though it might be very minute to the eye. But it is there, a small heart beating along with yours in your body... wow. Initially, I couldn't really make out the developments. But slowly slowly changes are happening. My appetite started increasing, as did the circumference of my tummy. And then a month or so ago, I noticed an increased action inside my stomach which I initially mistook for the sounds of digestion. I have realized now, that it's my little one,moving its arms and legs instead. This noticeably happened on a Sunday evening while we were attending church service. The priest that day was very loudly exclaiming something, and I got some nice kicks inside. So far we have gone for 3 scans, and each time it was a wonderful moment to see that little one is doing greater and greater everyday.
And the nice thing is that I'm not the only one on the way to motherhood - some of our friends have joined the club too.
So here we are, almost half-way through ... Will keep you updated on this journey !

Winds of Change

Was a tiring day. Went to office in the morning, while Roy went for a medical check-up.
No, nothing serious. The company offered a free medical check-up, and the results were satisfying. I tried some Quartz 2D programming on the iPhone simulator to get the look of a bar chart, but it's not so easy. I left at 3.30. Couldn't get a bus. Usually there are so many 356C and "Big10" (yea they are really named so !!) buses plying to and from office, but today I got one after a long wait and a quick lunch in between at 4.30. Felt drained out and tired. Many a times I have felt that my efforts (in which ever area they may be) have gone wasted ... I have been trying and trying, but to no vain. I have started reading the book "The Answer", but will I ever be able to touch the real potential of my subconscious mind ? I wonder and I am scared.
Watched the movie "Slumdog Millionaire" on the PC. Nice movie, I must say. The way the story is interwoven, interesting .... And more so as Jamal the character was able to win the Jackpot and answer all the questions, because life had thrown him the answers in various stages of his life.

I have been thinking more and more about my life... the routine that I've been following. What if .... what if I take a plunge into the unknown ? Like in "The Answer", I am visualizing myself as a happy and tension free person. My life is abounding in happiness, a loving family, gud health and lots of money too ;)
My dear nonconscious mind, are you listening ?? I hope so !!!

Like a Phoenix ...

Today is "Ash Wednesday", so was thinking for a suitable title. And somehow I had to think of the Phoenix... I remember as a kid I drew a phoenix, a very colorful one.. and I earned quite some praise for it. Since then I have been fascinated by the Phoenix - the bird that dies and rises from the ashes, just to become another glorious bird. This much for the title.

To tell about "Ash Wednesday", it is the first day of Lent(fasting season before Easter) and occurs forty-six days before Easter.Ash Wednesday gets its name from the practice of placing ashes on the foreheads of the faithful as a sign of repentance.

I wanted to go to attend church service today, and so left office early (i mean 5.30 is early according my standards ;)). I thought I would miss the beginning of the service, but God must have heard this, coz the service started only after I reached the church at 6.30pm. Shobhs also came. The church was really full. To the right of us, there was a young man holding his baby girl. The baby was sleeping initially, but woke up after some time. She started to look around and give a hearty giggly baby laugh towards the kid playing with her. That laughter was so pure, me and Shobs felt so happy on seeing her smile like that. And she'd smile at us too :) Such an innocense and such a love... even to a stranger. I usually don't fall for babies, but this one certainly did it. The father came alone with his baby and held her so caringly like we wished God would hold us like that .... That would be really nice .. to be this small again and not to think or worry....

Magical lullaby

Couldn't sleep ...I have caught a strong-willed viral fever ... last friday, it came into my life and during our Hampi trip it became only stronger, and here it is , still having a strong grip over my life ... oops body. Left office early with an intention of crawling early into my cozy bed and having a gud nite sleep...

But somehow couldn't ... Let's say external factors were not allowing me to do so ... I keep on thinking how married life has changed me, or rather what kind of chains it has pulled around me. Some nice and some not so nice ...

Sometimes I also wonder if I was meant at all to marry ...

I'm listening to the song "Tu Muskura" from Yuvraaj ... Wished I had an iPod so that I could listen to it wherever I go .. But then you don't need an Ipod for that.

"Tu muskura jahan bhi hai tu muskura
Tu dhoop ki tarah badan ko chhoo zara
Shareer se ye muskuraahtein teri
Badan mein sunti hoon main aahatein teri
Labon se aa ke chhoo de apne lab zara "

AR Rahman, dear friend, you are a wonder kid ... Hope you'll compose more such lullabys for me .... Gnite n Sweet Dreamz :)

Wish you the 3 Somethings in 2009 !!!

Saw this quote today :

Three grand essentials to happiness in this life are something to do, something to love, and something to hope for.

-Jose Addison

Very true ... if I look back at the year 2008 that was.
This time I did not take time to really think about any new or old failed resolutions.
But I felt I should do or rather not do one thing this year.
This year I should not give my love, affection, care, laughter & joy to everyone I care for, but only to those who need it and have time to appreciate these.

I feel it was a waste ... of my time, my positive energy.
Everyone around me seems so involved with their job, wantingly or not they cannot enjoy the simple things in life... They do not have time for me.... Not that I complain, but I must say that I used to enjoy the fun moments I had with them.

How come I still have time to laugh and dance ???

Change

Today I came across change of two types ... and it made me wonder.
In the morning I met my friend A. After exchanging the usual "Hi.." , he told me that he was going to OOC. "So you are going onsite? " I asked him. "When are you going?" He told me that it would be next month. "Oh. Then are you taking Ammu with you?"
"No." he said and was he actually blushing ?? "She is actually carrying. I am going to be a father." He was speaking the last sentence so softly. I was literally surprised. A's marriage was in October only and wow here he is ... going to be a Dad soon.
Two changes that happened pretty quickly in succession - he changing to marital status and then now to parental status. I must say though that both are changes for the good only. And I am really happy for A and Ammu.
Then, after lunch as I was strolling with a friend, I saw someone familiar. "Hey. This guy looks like X. Hmmm or more like the thinner version of him." My friend turned around in that direction and said "Well, it is X." I had to blink twice to convince myself. Yes, it was X only. The last time I saw him, it must have been more than a year ago. He was not fat and not slim either then. He still had hair though maybe a slight receding hairline. Whatever ... he used to look healthy. Looking at him now, I must say, he looked sickly thin and I could see a small white patch on the back of his head, like a small cap. I don't know if he starved himself to this size or if he's suffering from something. It was kind of shocking to see him like that. Sad. X was laughing and talking to someone. But how happy or healthy is he really ?? Here, change has happened also. X has progressed in his life - professionally and personally. But the change that is so obvious to your eye is nothing pleasant.

Salut & Farewell ...

Strange ..., in French "Salut" is used to greet one another.
In English, the military salute their superiors and those of higher rank. And now I want to salute all those bravehearts who have sacrificed their lives for us and our country...
Also, Farewell to all those who had to leave us, not because they were protecting us from the enemy but because there was no one to protect them. Sainia Sehgal Saikia is one of them. I feel sad for her family. I don't know her, but everyone who knew her seemed to love her. She was a foodie and an acclaimed food critic. She stood out from the long list of people who got killed mercilessly.
The reason why I mention her is because I loved the obituary cartoon that TOI had published for her: 2 angels in front of pearly gates and one saying to the other : "we've got a famous food critic coming and I hope our nectar will be up to her standards.." This was so different from the so common "We will miss you ... " obituaries.

It is now one week that this incident has happened, and still the fire of anguish and hurt is burning in peoples' hearts. People go out and burn candles and pray. They show a lot of solidarity. And I was wondering ... There were bomb blasts earlier too happening in Ahmedabad, Delhi, Bangalore but never have we seen this kind of solidarity. I don't think that the death of Kamte, Karkare , Salaske & Sandeep Unnikrishnan is the reason. Rather, I believe, the reason is that this time, the attack was focused on the posh places such as the Taj, Oberoi and the Trident and killed many high-society men and women. All this time, the men and women from this strata of society must have thought that this could never happen to them. And why spend time and money for the death of some poor people !!! As long as we are safe, why should we bother or complain? And bang .. see who is talking now... You have Shobhaa De, Karan Johar, Mukesh Ambani etc talking sense and sensibility all on a sudden. Sadly but true, this has been an eye-opener for the government as well. I hope this time we will be able to do something !!!